


Masks of One's We Love

by CreepyLittleLullaby



Series: Langst (Voltron Legendary Defender) [3]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Cuban Lance (Voltron), Denial, Depressed Lance (Voltron), F/M, Homesick Lance (Voltron), Insecure Lance (Voltron), Langst, M/M, Personality Swap, References to Depression
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-31
Updated: 2017-05-31
Packaged: 2018-11-07 04:39:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,795
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11051511
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CreepyLittleLullaby/pseuds/CreepyLittleLullaby
Summary: Based off prompt by imyaslavie on tumblr! All my love to you darling!In a happy fun celebration, what could you expect but personality changing aliens? The curious thing though... is through it Lance doesn't change at all...





	Masks of One's We Love

Bright lights and pretty decorations, with loud laughter and the scent of amazing food. Everyone was laughing, smiling, and having fun. It was another battle well fought after all. What wasn’t there to be happy about? A fight for the good side won! Lance smiled, mingling around the room and spinning from person to person, passing out smiles, and flirts like candy. Making awful tasteless jokes so the tipsy people would laugh and the sober ones would roll their eyes and bit back a smirk. Basically, he had to act like the goofy charming person he always was. And he’d never felt more out of place. But, fake it til you make it he guessed. He had a responsibility to chat with everyone, try to impress them, strengthen ties and alliances with smooth comments, witty jokes, and reassurances. Reinforce their belief in them as Voltron. An unstoppable force fight for the good fight. Heroic knights. Ready for action twenty-four seven. 

No time for even a relaxing break and celebration in war, he guessed. 

So, he put on a show. Just like all those times in his school’s theater, as he played the lead. Even on the days he wanted nothing more than to just sleep instead of rehearsing until nearly three a.m. without dinner and no breaks. The party almost reminded him of those days, except his make up for the party was on fleek and well-practiced and he was being fed more than enough by these kind people. He smiled, flirted, and chatted with every new guest. Breaking away at times to greet a lonely wall flower to dance, or pulling himself into another group to chat and make sure no one was lonely or bored. Though sometimes he sought out a paladin to accompany for a little while, just for a little familiarity or a reminder of what to keep in the front of his mind, before he was peeled away to another group.

He was doing his job really well, all the paladins smiling knowingly when their gazes fell onto him, the charmer of the group. With a large stage presence and a bright light that seemed to draw everyone in towards him. Smiling and laughing effortlessly, hair fluttering and eyes shining as he flirted and joked around, keeping up discussions and the lightness. Like he always did, Keeping the mood cheery and happy was his specialty, just like acting. The few things he was good, almost a genius at. Just like his people skills, knowing just how to connect with people, what their tastes of attitude were. Which mask and personality to use to get the best reaction, which version of him they would like the most.

The blue paladin was in the middle of a conversation with a few of the locals in charge of the party, congratulating them on such a good turn out and even when he was waved over by Allura from her place on the side with Coran and seemingly a new guest standing in between them comfortably. Lance bowed his head and excused himself before waltzing over to the princess with a wide grin. The new person was a female, he could tell, with light grey almost silver skin and light platinum colored hair, one of the other races of aliens that inhabited this plant was his guess. He stopped in front of her, gracefully bowing at the waist and gently grabbing her hand. Kissing the knuckles of her right hand with a gentlemanly butterfly touch before looking up with a wink and a sly grin to contradict the politeness with some flirty playfulness.

“How may I be of assistance to this lovely lady before my eyes?” Allura rolled her eyes as most of his attention stayed on her. Knowing by now that this was just how Lance acted and was as a person, he was a flirty jokester, but didn’t mean anything really by it. Just thriving with the fun and playful attention, the praise. Usually getting a little bashful when someone he had jokingly hit on actually flirted back. Though, Allura wouldn’t put it past him to gloss over the shock and smoothly retort back, he was resilient and adaptable. The princess had learned by now that it was just for some attention, and maybe to have someone to joke around with, learning just how to jokingly brush it off. Occasionally indulging him by sassing back, as when she did it always made Lance’s infectious grin only grow wider as she played along. It made the occasional playing worth the small reality break. 

“Lance, this ‘lovely lady’ as you so eloquently put,” Lance clicked his tongue and sent a wink her way with finger guns. “Is known as Elstra. Elstra?” 

The woman laughed brightly, the sound was high and bright like bells, matching the up-beat energy of the party well, “Oh my, what a flattering young man the blue paladin is. You told me he was a charmer, but you didn’t tell me he was handsome too Allura. Well, Lance the blue paladin, I am Elstra, me and my people are inhabitants of this planet as well and we wanted to come by and thank you for your service, as well as give you a small gift.” Allura smothered a smile as the woman handed him a seemingly innocent looking drink. This alien race Allura knew, was well known for their small pranks of changing or intensifying one’s emotions and personality. Only temporarily of course, and perfectly harmless. Allura would be lying if she said she wasn’t interested in seeing how Lance reacted with another’s pranks, and the change in mood and chemical balance. It would certainly be something to remember, no matter what the tall woman chose to do. Either way, Allura saw Lance glowing with the praise and gift. Like a giddy child on Christmas. Accepting the gift happily after her and Coran’s permission.

“Thank you m’lady.” The ever spirited and polite paladin smiled easier than he had all night, drinking the gift and giving another strained but convincing smile that was forced at first. His fatigue was beginning to wear on him, no matter how good the praise made him feel temporarily. It felt like he was weighed down with lead and a dark cloud over his head, until just a few moments later.

Man, Lance swore it was like a shot of pure happiness ripping through him. Clearing the dark clouds and almost making him feel like he was floating, instead of sinking. It was like adrenaline and morphine and everything good was running through his veins on all at once. A lazily and happy grin lit up his face as he began giggling uncontrollably. He was so light! Maybe this is what people called a high? No, it wasn’t drugs he didn’t think. It was like he was suddenly stoned on life. And he’d never felt better. Even as his cheeks began to hurt with how wide his grin was. He gave his thanks to Elstra one last time before smoothing his hair back with a single hand and going straight for a handsome alien guy that he’d been eyeing nervously for the entire party almost. His confidence skyrocketing to impossible levels as he put on an even brighter and more charming beaming smile, courageously giving a terrible pick up line that kick started a conversation of flirty quips and small passive gestures. 

Shiro looks at the suddenly even more lively blue paladin and smiles knowingly, shaking his head with a small chuckle as he slowly strolls up to Allura and Elstra as the other paladins slowly joining as they saw Lance light up like a Christmas tree on steroids. Looking even more lively if possible, a humming and happy energy practically glowing around him brighter than before, more magnetic. Shiro gives a small half smile and jokingly scolds her.

“I didn’t think he needed an amplification drink ma’am, do you know how hard it’s going to be to drag him away from the party now that he’s got nearly double the energy and flirting will force? He’s going to be rambling our ears off the entire way.” The jab at Lance’s behaviors was reassured to be a joke as Shiro gave a fond smile to the Cuban male. Elstra was also staring at the tan boy, only instead of fond smiles and playfully rolling eyes she had a small frown. Eyebrows furrowing in confusion and concern as she watches the blue paladin teasingly swing his hips, pure joy and frisky intentions as he gladly lets the good looking alien pull him to the impromptu dance floor. Still within their sight, even as he was swarmed by more people, attracted to and wanting to dance with the bubbly brunet. More than willing to give anyone and everyone attention as he still stayed by the side of his first affections. Elstra tilts her head and slowly curls it towards Allura and Shiro in a strange, but elegant swooping motion, still shooting worried glances at Lance. 

“I… I’d thought I gave him a personality changing vial…” Elstra rummaged through her small hand bag, fingers twitching anxiously as she found the vial and quickly read the label on the clear glass vial. “Yes, this is it. This one changes a person’s natural behaviors diametrically. I’d know the label anywhere, I use it often enough.”

Shiro looked back at Lance, moving back to the conversation after a moment of examination of the blue eyes brunet. “Are you sure you didn’t switch the liquid you put in the vials? I mean absolutely no offence by this of course miss, I’m just confused. Lance is acting like he always does, bad jokes and all.” Shiro ended with a nervous chuckle.

Elstra frowned, “No… I remember breaking the seal when we arrived here… I couldn’t open it when we were flying here. Too much motion, I was afraid of spilling it. I had to borrow a knife from the red paladin to break the seal, did I not?” Keith nodded at the silent question, affirming that he did in fact crack open the vial. “This is the real one that I gave him.”

Hunk piped in this time, “But, if this is the opposite of his nature, then how would he normally feel and be like in your experience, as you said before that you’ve used this often.” Hunk could handle the other paladin maybe forcing a few smiles or jokes when he was feeling scared or homesick for the others sake. He was selfless and caring like that. Hunk could understand feeling doubtful, Lance wasn’t always confident with his English or academics. Or how he was always a little off put when someone actually flirted back. Maybe, this whole business was just nothing. Maybe Lance was having a day when he was feeling tired and worn out from the battles, no one said this life was easy. Maybe he was just forcing a few things or changing a few things to get some of his confidence and playfulness back. He couldn’t adjust like he had in the Garrisons, calling home when he was feeling homesick from a huge boisterous family. It was bad circumstances, right? A fluke. Still, Hunk wasn’t liking the pit that was sinking in his stomach.

Elstra seemed to droop and dim a little, looking vaguely uncomfortable and anxious as her eyes darted from them to Lance periodically. “Um, well, from what I’ve seen with others I’d say others who reacted like this were often… well… um. Severely depressed. Usually suffering from various self-esteem, doubt, or self-hatred issues…” The woman quickly put her hands up in mock surrender at the terror on the paladins faces. “Though that doesn’t speak for everyone! I could react differently in humans than it does on the people on this planet. It could act as an amplifier as you previously concluded, would you like to try it on someone else just in case? I do have a spare…” Allura nodded quickly, she didn’t like to assume anything after all. It acting differently in humans however, she knew that she was grasping at straws and trying to pull from this woman’s naivete about human’s systems and minds, when really Allura knew that they were practically the same in function. But, if it meant she wasn’t failing one of her paladins so horribly as to not notice one breaking inside every day, one that she especially looked to be one of the happiest of the group, she would grab at every straw she could.

Pidge volunteered immediately, holding out her hand as Elstra gave her a vial. Pidge saw Lance as her pillar, he’d been her friend for so long. He’d supported her, made her smile, or groan, or let her vent her anger and stress unfairly on him. She’d do anything to make sure he was really okay, even this, which if it was nothing but an amplifier, would probably make her anxiety and introverted nature a hundred times worse, Pidge knew she’d be the easiest to tell if it was opposite. As she’d likely become more polite and physically clingy, less vulgar. Pidge watched with a passive determination as Keith cracked open the vial with his knife and practically shoved it into her hands. Secretly anxious to see the results, as Pidge took the vial like a shot, downing it in seconds. It took a moment, but when the switch happened, it was obvious to everyone in the vicinity. Pidge’s normal look of neutral and cold calculation smoothed over into a relaxed expression. A lazy smile stretching on her lips like a grin. Patting Keith on the shoulder as a thank you, surprised the red paladin almost out of his skin at the gratitude. Then she waddled over to Hunk and clung onto Hunk’s arm, giggling and laughing. Babbling happily about some science thing that she’d been doing in her free time and that no one besides Hunk really understood.

The unaffected paladins each froze. Each looking at each other in looks of various shock and horror before blatantly staring at Lance. Happily laughing and dancing with everyone that came toward the magnetic presence. Conversing and interacting with an extra skip in his step. No, not extra. It was a lie, wasn’t it? All those times he told a self-deprecating joke that they brushed off as his strange brand of humor. All the stories and times they told him to be quiet. The times he’d laughed and smiled at them, trying to break the ice, lighten the mood, and make them all feel better. Grinning as they lashed out at him. Him telling them it was fine when they apologized. That he could understand that they were having a rough time. 

All lies.

Fucking lies!

He wasn’t happy. There wasn’t anything funny about those jokes poking fun at his intelligence or attitude. The times he ‘jokingly’ called himself stupid, or a little shit. He wasn’t ‘fine’, like he always claimed to be. He was suffering. Just as much as they were. Maybe even worse. Because where they knew each other well, not one of them knew Lance behind the smiling mask. The one that was once convincing, now horrifying as they saw the truth in it. The way the mask took his sadness and stretch it into a strained and bleeding, hollow smile. Hiding his tears and pain. He wasn’t fine. 

But at the moment, all they could do was nothing. Absolutely nothing, but watch as he laughed happily at some alien’s stupid joke. His shoulder’s straight and head held high. Unburdened and relaxed, without a façade of confidence and happiness. Like they always thought was true and real for every moment of the day. That mask of his, was the true horror of it all. It was a second, skin-like things, that none of them had seen past for months, some of them years. How could they have seen past such a dopey grin, the one that encouraged them to smile along no matter what. The insufferable flirting and loud obnoxious stories that carried in his voice through the castle walls, filling the void of space’s silence. They hadn’t known. Until now, as Allura was crushed, Coran devastated, Keith in silent shock, Shiro in disbelief, Hunk, disturbed at how his best friend knew all his insecurities and sufferings so well, and he couldn’t even return the favor. Not even knowing a single one of the horrors that haunted Lance every day. They saw him. Everyday. Lived with him. Everyday. Anyone would argue that they should have known him the best. Seen past the stupid, lying, happy mask. But really,

They swear they hadn’t known.


End file.
